Leap of Faith (25/?)

[amberfocus]

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Title:  Leap of Faith (25/?)
Author:  amberfocus
Characters/Pairings:  John Smith (alt!Nine)/Rose Tyler, Toshiko Sato, Jake Simmonds, Mickey Smith, Ianto Jones, Jackie Tyler/Pete Tyler, Tony Tyler, various original characters
Genre:  Romance, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe
Rating:  Adult
Betas:  amyo67, jeprdyfrndly
Summary:  Hiding from the Family of Blood, the alt!Ninth Doctor turns himself into John Smith via the chameleon arch and with his companion Toshiko Sato, takes a job at Torchwood.  He clashes with everyone he meets and Rose Tyler, the beautiful young director of Torchwood Field Operative Training and the daughter of his boss, is no exception.  AU after season 2.

Previous Chapters:  http://amberfocus.livejournal.com/327895.html

Chapter Twenty-Five: Unvarnished Truths

“So,” said Tosh when they’d been in the SUV for five minutes and Rose hasn’t said one word to her and she felt the need to break the companionable silence. Her earlier decision to let things go was coming back to bite her. She was still…worried. She needed to see exactly where Rose stood without John around to dull her mind with hormones.

Rose kept her eyes on the road, her hands deftly working the steering wheel. “So?” she repeated when Tosh said nothing further.

“So, you and John. You’re going to go through with it?”

“Through with what?” asked Rose, sounding slightly amused to Tosh’s consternation. She was silent and Rose raised her eyebrows in irritation. “Spit it out.”

“You’re really…dating him?” Tosh finally asked.

“Told you that already,” Rose replied. “We had our first date last night.”

“Those didn’t look like first date kisses this morning. And I’ve seen the tabloids, Rose. You and him out and about on the town.”

“Well, there have been a few unofficial…not dates, exactly, just…hanging out before last night,” Rose admitted.

“But…you don’t really like him.”

“Yeah, I do,” Rose said with a firm tone and a slight smile. “I didn’t mean to,” she added a moment later. “It just kind of…happened.”

“You can’t know him well enough to foresee how all of this might turn out,” Tosh began. “It could be a disaster.”

“Relationships are a leap of faith, Tosh. You never know how they’re going to turn out when you start them.” She turned the car right, leaving behind the crowded main roads of Cardiff and heading into the more residential areas. “Look at you and me.”

“I know. We clicked instantly, but it’s not the same. I’m not trying to romance you and…John is a difficult man,” she tried again.

“Don’t I know it,” Rose snorted and Tosh made a small startled noise. “What? You think I don’t know he’s cantankerous and grumpy and doesn’t play well with others? Because I do. I see John’s flaws, Tosh. Probably even more clearly than you do.”

“And doesn’t it just scare you to death?”

“I’ve seen a lot of frightening things in my life. Having a relationship with John Smith might scare me, but it doesn’t terrify me. I thought you’d be happy for us,” Rose said. “He’s your best friend.”

“I am happy for you,” Tosh said. “I’m just…worried for you, too.”

“That’s sweet of you, but I am a big girl. I can take care of myself,” she said.

“Are you sure about that?”

“Why? Because I’ve had my heart broken before?”

“Yes,” Tosh said.

“John’s not going to do what the Do—I’m not going to lose him like that. It was a once in a lifetime thing. Never happen like that again. It can’t,” she said.

“You can’t know that.”

“There’re some things I know,” Rose said flatly. “That’s one of them. The circumstances of our parting… No, it can’t.”

“What if he breaks your heart?” Tosh asks.

“Then he breaks it,” Rose said. “He’s already mended it. Maybe it’s his heart to break now.”

“But I—.”

“Are you in love with him, Tosh? Is that what the problem is?”

“No! He’s not even my type,” Tosh exclaimed.

“Well, he is mine,” said Rose. “Decidedly so. It was hard in the beginning, but we get on now and even though there are rough moments, I don’t want to give up on him, on the us that we’re becoming. I think John and I could really build something. Something that lasts.”

“You like him that much?”

Rose’s hands tightened on the steering wheel. “I think I love him,” she said in a rush. The words had an air of being said for the first time and Tosh sucked in her breath.

“Are you sleeping with him?”

“What? No. First date, remember. Nosy, much?” Rose didn’t sound as indignant as Tosh would have been had the situation been reversed.

“Sorry,” said Tosh. “I’m sorry. I saw the way you were with him, the way you were kissing him. It was so intimate and I...it’s none of my business.”

“Maybe it is a little,” sighed Rose. “You’ve been in his life a long time, been the only one he’s had to turn to for everything. It’s only natural you might be feeling a little insecure, trying to figure out where your place is in all of this.”

“A little,” Tosh agreed. She sighed. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t going to do this. It’s just that we’ve gotten close, Rose, and I worry about you. I know what kind of man Dr. Smith really is and he doesn’t settle down, he doesn’t get the house and the mortgage and the dog and the 2.5 kids in the country.”

“I don’t want all of that,” Rose said indignantly, her voice slightly sarcastic. “Hello. Rose Tyler. Defender of the Earth. I work for Torchwood. Maybe you’ve met me?” Silence fell between them. “Besides…I can’t have kids.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Never really wanted them when I was young,” Rose said with a shrug. “I saw how hard things were on Mu—on the woman who raised me. Might’ve been nice to have the choice, but I’ve had three and a half years knowing it’s nearly impossible for me to be a mum and I can live with that. John not wanting kids is a good thing for me, because I can’t give them to him. Though I think you might be wrong about the dog.”

Thinking of K-9, powered down and turned off back in the TARDIS, she had to admit Rose might be right. She sighed again. “I just don’t want anyone to get hurt.”

“Neither do I, believe me,” Rose said emphatically.

They fell silent again. After a while Tosh asked hesitantly, “Do you mind my asking why you can’t have children?”

Rose bit her lip. “Damaged DNA,” she said finally.

“Is that Torchwood’s fault?” Tosh asked.

“I…was exposed to something once. It was a long time ago. Before Torchwood. It…sort of burned me from the inside out. I didn’t find out until I came to work for Torchwood and had that scan thing they do down in medical, but I knew immediately what had caused it,” Rose said softly. “It left a pretty identifiable signature.”

“What?” asked Tosh.

“It’s too hard to talk about,” said Rose and Tosh noticed a single tear track down Rose’s face. “It belongs to my past. A past I can never have back and I…I just…”

“I’m sorry.”

Rose nodded. “Tell me what you’ve been doing since you got to Cardiff.” Her voice was pleading and Tosh went along with the change of subject, telling Rose what she’d been up to work wise as well as outside of it, since she’d come to Wales. The new conversation helped Rose’s saddened mood to vanish and by the time Tosh had finished, Rose was back to her old slightly sarcastic self.

“So you’ve been spending quite a lot of time with Owen, then?” Rose asked.

“A bit,” said Tosh. “He seems like a decent bloke. Interesting to look at, but not classically attractive. Intelligent. I like him so far.”

“Just be careful. You have a tendency to collect broken strays,” Rose commented. “First John, then me, now Owen.”

“Owen’s not broken,” Tosh said. “And I haven’t been collecting him. We just get on well and have a lot to talk about.”

“Yeah,” said Rose. “He told you about Katie, then?”

“His wife? Yeah. She died in the war, but he seems to have dealt with that okay,” said Tosh.

“Seems to being the operative words. None of us who have lost someone to the Cyber War just get over it, you know,” Rose said. “He’s done better than some, what with Kathlyn to take care of, but—.”

“Kathlyn?” Tosh asked curiously. “Who’s that?”

“His daughter,” Rose said in surprise.

“What?”

Rose took her eyes off the road and glanced over at Tosh for a moment. “Owen has told you that he has a daughter, hasn’t he?”

Tosh swallowed hard. “I guess it never came up.” Rose made a non-committal noise. “I don’t think he was keeping her from me. We just never talked about kids.”

Rose shrugged. “Probably,” she said. “Do you want kids, Tosh?”

“Someday,” she said, “but not until I’m done travelling.”

“You don’t plan to stay at Torchwood?” Rose asked in surprise.

“Dr. Smith and I only signed one year contracts. After that we’re going travelling again. You know his primary focus in on alien archeology. It can’t all come to you. You have to go out to it,” Tosh said. “Seven more months and we’re out of there.”

Rose’s hands clenched on the steering wheel and her jaw stiffened. “You’re leaving?” Her voice was very high.

“That was always the plan.” Tosh noticed the sudden tension in Rose. “Of course, that was before John met you,” she added hastily. “I haven’t really discussed the future with him since the two of you got together.”

“I guess…I guess I haven’t either.”

“Well, maybe you should, you know. Before the two of you get any more involved.”

Rose swallowed convulsively. “Yeah,” she agreed, “maybe we should.”



Jane took Kathlyn and Marcie out to buy infant sized nappies, bottles, formula, and clothes for the newly rejuvenated baby while John and Owen began a new series of careful tests on the little one’s blood. When the females returned with a few small outfits for the baby, John hated himself for thinking the child probably wouldn’t be around long enough to wear all of them. He had to tell himself harshly that that was defeatist thinking, that there was still time to cure her or rather, stop her cure from killing her.

Owen decided there wasn’t too much they could do as the current batch of tests ran through the processor so he took Kathlyn out to a nearby pizza place for lunch. John watched as Jane used Owen's desk to dress Marcie in a tiny little pair of overalls, and then handed the baby towards him. He put up his hands defensively. “Whoa, no, I don’t think so,” he said. “Give her to Mayumi. I don’t do babies.”

Jane pressed Marcie into his arms anyway. “I’ve got to pee,” she said. “And I am not climbing down two sets of stairs to the cellar first.”

“There’s the lift,” John said pointing across the vast area to the other side of the hub.

“And there’s the loo,” Jane said pointing to the little room next to the break room. “Suck it up, Dr. Smith. You can take her for a minute. Actually make if five. These damn support hose are driving me crazy.” She waddled off to the loo and John looked down at the baby like she was a paradox waiting to happen. It was hard for him to believe that the baby he was holding with the soft blonde curls was the same little person he’d played checkers with just a scant few hours ago, a child he’d actually liked.

He got on surprisingly well with young children. They seemed to be able to see through his general crankiness, much the same way as Rose did, and accept him for who he was. Babies were a whole different story. He was glad that Rose didn’t particularly want children. Oh, she seemed fond of her little brother, and she’d been good with that kid in the park, but she certainly didn’t have a violently ticking biological clock. Quite the opposite really, which was good in their line of work. He’d never really craved children, even when he thought he and Ro might…well. She had made a wonderful mother, just not to his child. He skittered away from that thought. Ro’s betrayal still burned in him if he let himself think too hard about it.

The baby started fussing and he realized he was still holding her at arms’ length. With a reluctant sigh he brought the infant into his body, letting her rest her head against his shoulder, still trying not to think about how he’d almost been a dad once. Marcie settled after a moment of nuzzling and went limp against him. He glanced at the clock hoping that Jane didn’t need the entire five minutes to relieve him of his tiny burden.

He was trying to feel rather cross when the clock ticked by ten minutes instead of the promised five, but it was hard with the warm bundle snuggled against him. She made a soft little noise and started rooting around his neck. He might be a grump but he wasn’t totally immune to the poor thing. Hunger seemed to be radiating off her in waves. He made a soft noise of comfort and stroked her back. He was just glad Tosh wasn’t around to see him looking so—he didn’t even know what—as Jane appeared with a bottle. She’d tease him for weeks.

“Do you want to give it to her?” Jane asked holding out the formula. The sour look he gave her made her take a step back in surprise. “You’re a natural with her,” Jane commented.

“I don’t like kids,” he said.

“Why not?” she asked in surprise retrieving Marcie from his arms and shifting her into the crook of her arm. She sat down in Owen’s chair and popped the bottle into Marcie’s mouth. The baby immediately began to drink, draining half the bottle in just a few seconds. “She’s starving.”

“I’m not surprised. The regression burns up a lot of energy.”

“Well? Are you going to answer my question?” Jane asked.

“Just…fatherhood isn’t for me. My life’s too dangerous,” John said.

“You’re an archeologist and a biochemist,” Jane snorted. “How is that dangerous?”

“I work for places like Torchwood, and before that UNIT.”

“Yeah, but that’s a choice. If you became a father, you could find safer jobs in either of your fields,” Jane pointed out. “Didn’t you used to teach at Oxford? Does it get any safer than that?”

“You’ve been reading my file?” John asked in irritation, conveniently forgetting how he’d gone through—well, stolen—Rose’s file the day he met her.

“I have to be up on anyone that comes into the hub,” Jane said with a shrug. “I’m in charge of personnel and deployments. It’s my job. It’s not an invasion of your privacy.”

“Well, asking me why I don’t want kids is,” he said.

“Point,” Jane said. “Guess I’m a little close to the issue.” Marcie finished the bottle and Jane put a towel over her shoulder before maneuvering the infant into place and burping her expertly.

Owen arrived with Kathlyn a moment later, hugged his little girl and sent her off with Jane and the baby to play in Jane’s office. He dumped a box with a little less than half a pizza on John’s desk and John’s stomach growled involuntarily at the sharp scent of pepperoni and sausage. He’d forgotten to eat. He tended to get so absorbed in his work that usually Tosh, or more recently Rose, had to remind him when it was time for lunch. “Here, eat,” Owen said. “It’s still warm.” John moved to open the box and picked up a slice, biting into it. “Did you find anything while I was gone?”

“Oh, that’s good. No. The current batch of tests still has about twenty minutes to go,” John said

“Has there been any change in Marcie since the last go around?” Owen asked.

“No, she seems stable for the moment. Jane said she seemed fairly content on the shopping expedition.” He took another big bite of the pizza.

“What about Mayumi?” he wanted to know.

John glanced at the monitor that showed the medical ward. “She’s sleeping. Having a fussy baby in with her tired her out. Since Jane’s had Marcie for the past few hours, Mayumi decided to grab a nap while she could.”

“Has she regressed since this morning?” Owen asked.

“Mayumi? Not that I’m aware of, but it’s probably time for it soon. Hopefully it’ll happen in her sleep.” They’d noticed that at the adult level the rejuvenation didn’t seem to be all that painful, but what little discomfort there was seemed to be muted by sleep.

Owen sighed. “I suppose I should get the artificial womb set up, just in case. John, if we lose her…” He rubbed his hand over his face and glanced up at Jane’s office, unable to finish his sentence.

John didn’t know what to say so took another bite of pizza while he thought about it. “There’s a man coming down from London with Mickey Smith. Gabe something or other. He was hit with a Taltin rejuvenation beam a few years ago. Rose said they were able to kind of reverse it a bit with help from the aliens that made it. It’s a slow reversal, but he is aging faster than he’d normally be, at least until he gets back to the age he was when he was hit.”

“Do they have the device?” Owen asked. “Because maybe we could use it on Marcie, if not reverse the process, at least stop it. Stabilize her.”

“I don’t know,” John said. “I’m not sure the aliens ever handed it over. I think they just worked with Torchwood scientists to attempt to fix the problem.”

“What did you say they were called again?” Owen asked.

“Taltins.”

Owen frowned then sat down at his work station, typing frantically. “They had a colony here on Earth for a bit, but eventually most of them just faded into the general population. They can pass for human.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“But they have to have locator chips. Any alien that makes a permanent residence on the planet, any alien processed through Torchwood anyway, get’s a chip. If there are any Taltins living around here, we could bring them in and see if they can help us.”

“It’s not the same technology. The signature is completely different.”

“It doesn’t need to be the same,” Owen said. “It just needs to be able to arrest the changes, like they did with this Gabe person.” A large map was suddenly displayed on the screen. “We’re in luck. There’s a mating pair living in Cardiff and one of them is a scientist. Let me get clearance from Delilah and then I’ll call Tosh. She and Rose can pick them up and bring them in.”



Gabe and Mickey arrived at Torchwood before Rose and Tosh returned with the Taltins. Owen immediately pounced on Gabe for a blood sample, which the man willingly gave while trying to explain his own situation to the two doctors in as much detail as he understood. Gabe wasn’t a scientist, but he had about as good a grasp on the subject as a layman could who’d studied his own situation to the best of his ability to understand it.

Mickey, on the other hand, had disappeared to speak with Jane and Delilah and garner any information from them that might help. When Mickey returned he was carrying the baby. “She just had a seizure,” he told them as he handed the baby to Owen.

“It doesn’t look like she regressed any further,” said John looking at Marcie while she shook in Owen’s arms. “I think we should try making a blood cure before it’s too late.”

“Do you need more blood?” asked Gabe. Owen nodded and he rolled up his sleeve.

John got to work harvesting blood from Gabe. With the new extraction method that had been developed with help from the Ge’Ya’shoni, John was able to remove a pint of blood quickly and painlessly from Gabe. What normally would have taken an hour with the old techniques took fifteen minutes. He placed the blood into the centrifuge and began to spin it. It needed to go for fifteen minutes as well.

“So what exactly are you doing?” Mickey asked as they watched the machine spin and Gabe munched on a slice of pizza and drank some juice to help restore him after the blood draw.

“With the spinning, the serum in the blood will rise to the top. It’s a thin liquid containing plasma, red blood cells and white blood cells. We siphon that off and we’re left with platelet rich plasma. We’ll transfuse that directly into Marcie. Hopefully whatever the Taltin’s did to Gabe’s blood to restore his aging process will work with Marcie, or at the very least, stabilize her. The one bit of luck we have is that Marcie is a universal receiver. It’d be better if Gabe was a universal donor because then we could try this on Mayumi, too, but he’s not,” Owen explained.

“But Mayumi still has a few days,” John said. “If this doesn’t work, Marcie’s only got hours.”

“It’ll work,” Owen said grimly. “I am not losing that child.”

Marcie seized once more a few minutes later, but despite that, did not regress again. Her crying became shrill and insistent afterwards and surprisingly the only person that could calm her back down was Mickey. John went and fetched the wooden rocking chair that had been installed upstairs when Jane had had her first baby and brought it down to the lab so Mickey could settle into it with Marcie.

When the platelets were ready they transfused the baby while Mickey cuddled her close and fed her another bottle. “You’re a natural with children,” Gabe said. “Took me a month after the birth of my first before I even looked that comfortable holding a babe.”

Mickey shrugged. “Kids like me and I like them.”

“You should have some,” said Gabe.

“That would require a woman,” said Mickey reasonably. “And a relationship. And falling in love.”

“There’s a girl in human resources—,” began Gabe.

“No, thank you,” said Mickey. “Last time I dated a Torchwood employee it didn’t end well.”

The bottle was empty long before the transfusion bag and the baby had drifted off to sleep. Mickey continued to rock her gently until the process was complete. They called Jane down and she came to retrieve the sleeping child. Delilah Morgan came with her and remained behind to talk to the men. “So now what do we do?” Mickey asked.

“Well, you should get settled into the manor house and then starting tomorrow I’d like the two of you to start going out on interviews like Toshiko and Rose are doing,” Delilah said. “The more we can find out about the man who is doing this to all these people, the better chance we have of finding him and stopping him.”

“Is there any progress on that UNIT doctor they were sending over to help us?” Owen asked. “I could do with an actual medical specialist.”

“She’s being extracted from Bolivia. It’s taking longer than they thought it would,” said Delilah. “Apparently the rebels bombed the zeppelin port and aren’t letting helicopters land. She’s being smuggled out. Last I heard she was on the Pilaya River. As soon as they get her to Paraguay they’ll fly her out of South America and get her here with all due haste. If we’re lucky we’ll see her by Friday. Until then you’ll just have to muddle through on your own.”



Rose rapped sharply on the front door of the home belonging to Wallace and Abigail Johnson. She knew that the Taltins were under no obligation to help them solve their problems, but she hoped that they’d come willingly. It took a minute before the door was answered and Wallace answered the door. She held out her Torchwood ID. “Hello, Mr. Johnson,” Rose said. “I’m Rose Tyler. This is my partner Toshiko Sato. Can we come in?”

The elderly man nodded and waved them inside. His wife, who was sitting in an overstuffed recliner, was knitting a long scarf. “Abigail, it’s Torchwood,” he said.

The woman looked up and then set her knitting down on top of a side table. “Would you like tea?” she asked pleasantly. Rose and Tosh looked at each other and nodded. Mrs. Johnson headed off in the direction of what Rose could see was the kitchen and Mr. Johnson waved them toward the couch.

“Sit down, please. What can we help Torchwood with today?” he asked.

“Do you remember the incident a few years back when one of our operatives was hit with a rejuvenation beam?” Rose asked.

“Is Gabriel all right?” he asked with sudden, sharp concern.

“Yes, Gabe is fine,” Rose said hastily. “He continues to re-age at the rate your scientists set for him. He’s not the problem.”

“Then what is?” asked Wallace.

“Someone has been going around to hospices and nursing homes and healing them,” Rose said.

“That doesn’t sound like a bad thing,” remarked Wallace.

“In theory, no,” said Tosh. “In practice, their bodies are rejuvenating.”

Rose picked up the thread. “But unlike with Gabe, they didn’t revert to a young age and then stop. These people are continuing to regress. One of them has become an infant and we’re very much afraid that she’ll continue to rejuvenate past a viable state of life.”

Abigail, who’d overheard them from the kitchen returned with a tray. She set it down in front of them and served the tea and then some pastries to the women. “And you think we can help?” she asked.

“I hope you can. You managed to reverse the process somewhat in Gabe and make him age again. Is there anything your technology can do to halt the aging process in this baby? Even if we can’t restore her completely, if we can just keep her from dying…well, it would be something,” Rose said.

“It really depends on the technology used,” Wallace said. He steepled his hands together, pressing the index fingers to his lips. “Have your scientists noted anything non-biological about the residue left in the victim’s bloodstream?”

“No,” said Tosh. “It appears purely biological in nature.”

“Then perhaps we can help,” said Abigail. “We use a form of infinitesimally small semi-sentient robots with a biological component, in our reversal process. They go in and reprogram the cells. Your science fiction programs would come close to considering them nanotechnology, but that would only be a crude approximation of what these machines are.”

Rose and Tosh nodded. “More like nanogenes?” Rose asked remembering how once upon a time Jack Harkness had healed her hands using them in a Chula ship.

“Smaller. More like picogenes,” Wallace replied.

“Do you have access to that sort of technology?” Rose asked. “I mean, now that the colony has dissolved?”

“Yes,” he said. “They live within us. It’s a simple matter to extract them, but I’d prefer to only do that in the safety of a controlled lab. I cannot guarantee they will help, but they will not hurt these people and they might possibly give them a fighting chance.”

“Then you’ll come back to the lab with us?” Rose asked.

“Certainly. Finish your tea while we pack some equipment,” Abigail said. Thirty minutes later they were on the road again and on their way to back to Torchwood Cardiff.

Ch. 26: http://amberfocus.livejournal.com/382396.html

Comments

[geordie-chick.livejournal.com]

I cannot have children and I wanted to say that I thought you handled this story development with huge amounts of care and tact. Well done lovely lady

xx

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It was very difficult for me to have my children, out of six pregnancies only two went to term, so I try to handle fertility issues and whatnot with a great amount of care. I know how much it hurt me to be in my situation so I always try to be careful with how I address it if it becomes a plot element.