amberfocus | Devastate (1/4) (Reply)

A/N: Recognizable dialog is from the episode Bad Wolf.

Devastate

Rose. The word pulses in his mind as he wakes up in the bottom of a strange wooden cubicle. Rose. It pushes at him as he finds the way out into a house that is strange and yet oddly familiar. Rose, as he tries to put things together and figure out how he got trapped in some crazy reality show. Rose, as he watches one girl die and rescues another. Rose, as he finds his way to Jack and the three of them search desperately for his missing life. Rose, as they locate her, burst into the studio and he sees her across the room. Rose, as she runs to him and he runs to her. Rose, as she’s almost in his arms. ROSE! And she’s gone in a destructive burst of laser light.

He falls to his knees, stares at the pile of dust where seconds earlier his beloved girl breathed her last breath. It’s impossible, he thinks. She can’t just be dead. Not like that. Not so ignobly. Not her. Not his Rose. She has too much life in her, too much life yet to live, too much life yet to give. But the evidence of his own eyes is clear, concise and to the point. He’s lost her, lost everything in one stupid, pointless, useless moment and now there’s nothing. Nothing left. No purpose. No light to balance his darkness. No joy. No Rose. It tears at him. He runs his fingers through the dust like he will never again do to her hair. And for one brief moment he wants to follow her into death.

He hears Jack raging in the background, remembers he still has one human to look after, two if he counts the guileless child with the Y in her name, but he cannot tear his eyes away from the remains of Rose, cannot think long enough about the other people in his care to do anything. He is vaguely aware of hands pulling at him, trying to drag him away from his Rose. He is numb, resists by doing nothing, but eventually he is yanked to his feet. It angers him when the arresting officer drags his own feet casually through the dust that was once his hearts.

He allows that feeling to build within him in the very center of his being, but he allows nothing to show on his face. Not yet. Only his devastation at the loss of Rose. It is not a mask, not really, because it is his overriding emotion. But the anger is there and he vows that someone, whoever is responsible, will pay for this action and if he has his way, that person will do so with their own life. The thought gives him pause as he stops to consider what Rose would think of that. She wouldn’t want him to, he knows, but she’s gone now and there’s no one to stop him, no one to hold back the building storm. Someone will pay the penalty for taking his life from him. His Rose.

Doctor. The first thought that drops into her mind as she wakes on the floor. Doctor. She doesn’t know where she is or how she got there and is confused by the face above her, one she’s never seen before, one that seems sympathetic only to turn on her later. Doctor, as she realizes the game she’s stuck in has deadly results. Doctor, as one by one her teammates are stripped away into death. Doctor, as it narrows down to only her and the no longer sympathetic man. Doctor, as she realizes the game is lost and she’s about to be murdered. DOCTOR! And he’s there shouting her name and she runs to him, runs to his arms and she’s almost there. Then she’s not.

There’s pain as she’s scrambled through space and put back together again, the overwhelming nausea threatening to make a mess on the nice shiny deck she finds herself on. It only takes seconds to get her bearings and then she is looking up into the face of fear. Her mind screams for her lover, but the only word that comes to her lips is Dalek.

Her stomach turns over again and she tries to calm the flutter there by pressing her hands firmly against it, willing it to stop, hoping there’s been no permanent damage from the transport as she forces bile back down. She gathers her courage together as the Daleks surround her. She will be brave and strong for her Doctor. She will not fall down in front of his enemies. Nor will she give them quarter. At first they ignore her, but then they are screeching about being detected and her heart leaps for a second knowing he’s found her, like he’s always found her, like he’ll always find her.

They order her to her feet and she manages to get shakily up using the wall behind her for support. And the view screen in front of her turns on and shows a ragtag band of humans, her Doctor in the middle and when he sees her on his own view screen he swallows down hard on his emotions, his eyes terrified for one brief moment before he’s back in control. Her heart goes out to him, so sorry to have put him in this situation. He is flip, as he so often is when he’s trying to cover for fear or hurt, but even that doesn’t stick as his eyes skitter back to meet hers.

They make their ultimatum, tell the Doctor not to interfere or they will exterminate her. His eyes well briefly and he gathers his resolve. She knows what his next word will be before she hears it, tries not to let it tear the bottom out of her world, because she knows he can’t give in to them. Not even for her. Still, the word rips through her. “No,” he says and he locks eyes with her.

“Explain yourself,” the Dalek demands.

“I said, no.” She tries to keep her eyes from widening in fear for herself, doesn’t want him thinking she thinks he’s betraying her when she knows it’s the only answer he can give them.

“What is the meaning of this negative?”

“It means no,” he says firmly.

“But she will be destroyed,” the Dalek says and if it’s possible Rose hears confusion in his tone. Confusion she can’t help but mirror on her own face until she hears his next words.

“No, ‘cause this is what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna rescue her. I’m gonna save Rose Tyler from the middle of the Dalek Fleet. And then I’m gonna save the Earth. And then just to finish off, I’m gonna wipe every last stinking Dalek out of the sky!” His voice is angry and determined and although it seems impossible Rose believes him in that moment, because he is her Doctor and he always keeps his word.

“But you have no weapons. No defenses. No plans,” protests the Dalek.

“Yeah, and doesn’t that just scare you to death?” the Doctor says with conviction and a maniacal look on his face that Rose is very glad is not being directed at her.

Then words are being directed at her. Soft words, starting with her name as only he can say it. “Rose?”

“Yes, Doctor?” she replies hope springing into her voice and eyes as she focuses on his face, sees…is it love on his face? So deep, yes, she thinks it must be love.

“I’m coming to get you.” And she believes it. Believes with everything in her being that he is. The view screen switches to space and she holds desperately to that hope as the Daleks surround her.

The metal monsters demand she predict what he’ll do, demand that she give them information, but she refuses, stands up and defies them. And then they fire missiles at the TARDIS as it’s in flight and she watches on the view screen as they impact into her Doctor’s ship in a vivid fireball that wipes the last trace of hope from her heart and she knows she’s lost him. The man she wanted forever with is gone. She never thought forever would end this soon. Her heart rips in two. She misses him already. Her Doctor.

Ch. 2: http://amberfocus.livejournal.com/62683.html