Fic Update, Hand Update, Life Update

[amberfocus]

I just sent ch. 5 of That Which One Cannot Be Without to Amy for beta.  I really like Jack in this chapter.  He's being...well, Jack.  And there's a teeny step forward in the romance of Rose and the Doctor.  I am hoping to finish writing the fic completely this weekend.  Then I'll go back to working on Zeppelins and the two other ficlets from the auction that I need to write.  After the ficlets are done, I'm hoping to get You're What? finished.

Oh, Captain91 I am betaing your fic now.  It'll probably take me a couple of days to finish it.  I'm thinking through some things.

My hand is doing a lot better these days.  The wrist is doing very well, the hand itself gets a little sore about midway down from the base of the middle and ring fingers, and of course the ring finger is still the worst of it all, but even it is much better.  I am easily typing two hours a day now but still icing the hand afterwards.

I think my mother has finally made the decision to put my dad into a nursing home.  She really just can't do what she's been doing anymore.  She managed to get herself dehyrated the other day and was so out of it she couldn't think to call me to come help her.  Dad can't dress himself anymore.  He's mostly blind, he's fully deaf in one ear and partially in the other.  He doesn't know who most of us are anymore and he can't remember from one minute to the next what has just been said.  It's been bad for over a year now and I think she's finally past the point of love and loyalty and realizing that if all of her energy is focused on Dad, there's none left for her to maintain her own health with.

My sisters both agree that Dad should go into the nursing home now.  I think she should have done it a year ago.  I'm the one that was still at home and had to watch her take care of her Alzheimer's mother, and then her mentally retarded sister for years.  I know what my mother can take and I know when she needs to give up and take care of herself.  It's time.  It's been time.  And we'll all visit Dad.  He won't be forgotten.  I just hope she won't change her mind again.  She really needs to do this for her health. 
 

Comments

[amyo67.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad your hand is getting better.

I'm sorry about your parents' situation. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I am not very good with words like some, just know that I am here for you.

*huggles you*

[tardisblue.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[wiggiemomsi.livejournal.com]

Your mother sounds like a strong, incredible woman, just like you.

Hang in there.

*Hugs you ... being very careful of your hand!*

[melnay13.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[ladychi.livejournal.com]

That decision is always hard (I used to work at nursing home) but I think in the end it's often worth it. The staff will be able to care for him effectively and you can go about the business of loving your father for who he is now and who he was without feeling guilty about feeling resentful for what his care is doing to you/your mother.

I'll keep my heart open and my rosary beads flying for your mother and your father and yourself!

[maniacalshen.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry. :-\ I went through something similar a few years ago with my mother taking care of her father. I mean, we were all here in the house, but it wasn't the time commitment as much as the emotional toll. You're right when you say it's clear when the time has come to opt for a nursing home, even if the sending doesn't happen til well past time.

Here's hoping for better days for your family, particularly your mom! Maybe someone needs a spa day for Mother's Day?

[solarflar3.livejournal.com]

Aww sweetie that is hard. I remember when my gran went into a nursing home. It was such a hard decision and she had always said, before her mind went, that she never wanted to go in one. But in the end it got too hard to care for her in her home. She needed more than we could give.

It'll be the right thing for him. Your mum must be worn out.

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I'm fine about my dad going in, he's not been himself in a long time. I just worry about my mom changing her mind again. She has a bit of a martyr complex.

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

I know it'll be worth if for my mother. She's been so drug down by having to do all this care for so long. She can't focus on keeping herself healthy and that scares me. I've made my peace with Dad's mind being gone, but I don't want to lose my mother, to her neglecting herself to care for Dad. Thank you.

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Oh, you made me giggle at the suggestion of a spa day. My mother is so not the type to do that. She hates primping and stuff like that. Though she does like a good massage now and then after all her gardening work. Hmm...

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

She is worn out. And my father always said that as soon as he became a burden to put him into one, so she really has no need to feel bad about that part, thank goodness. I just hope she'll really do it this time.

[captain91.livejournal.com]

glad to hear your hand is doing better, and your fic is in progress

like i said on the mail, don't feel you need to rush the beta'ing, the next chapter is strangling me anyway so i won't be going away! feel free to send a magic solution on how those elements can all fit together lol

[amyo67.livejournal.com]

I know how that is. My aunt was the same way when Mom and my other aunt wanted her to help with the decision to put my grandmother in a home, but it really was the best thing for Grandma.
Hope everything goes well.

*hugs you*

[abbieelove.livejournal.com]

I'm definately looking forward to your upcoming fics, especially Zeppelins!

I'm glad your hand's getting better and I'm sorry to here about your Mum and Dad *hugs*

[kaydle50.livejournal.com]

Wow, your Mom has been so caring and loving to others. I pray she will be able now to let others help her.Sometimes that is the hardest thing for caregivers.

I'm very glad your hand is on the mend.

I had the great joy and privilege of being a fanfic winner of a story by Captain91. And I so very badly want to know.....How is the Betaing of "A Day in the Life of Wolves" progressing?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Thanks

[amberfocus.livejournal.com]

I'll probably finish the beta this weekend. I homeschool my kids and it's been a bit crazy this week.

[kaydle50.livejournal.com]

Excellent!!! Yayyyyyy! Thanks so much.